Moe Bergeron

(This article could have turned into a unprofitable rant. Thankfully I did not go there. This topic is heavy upon my heart.)

All too often, the modern church presents a sanitized version of the Christian life, where suffering is viewed as a sign of weak faith or a problem to be solved quickly, rather than a reality to be endured together. To create a culture where suffering is shared and joy shines through, we must move from a “performance-based” community to a “grace-based” community. This requires intentional vulnerability, theological clarity, and the practice of bearing one another’s burdens as a tangible expression of the gospel.

Galatians 6:1–2

Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted. Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. 

 James 5:13–16

Is anyone among you suffering? Let them pray. Is anyone happy? Let them sing songs of praise. Is anyone among you sick? Let them call the elders of the church to pray over them and anoint them with oil in the name of the Lord. And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise them up. If they have sinned, they will be forgiven. Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous person is powerful and effective.

The culture of the church is shaped by what we tolerate, what we celebrate, and what we hide. If we only celebrate victories and hide our wounds, we create an environment where suffering is isolated and joy is superficial. But the New Covenant community is designed to be a hospital for the broken, not a museum for the perfect. The “law of Christ” is the law of love that is written upon the saint’s heart, which is most fully expressed when we carry the heavy loads of one another. When suffering is shared, it loses its power to isolate, and the peculiar joy of the saints—rooted in the presence of Christ in the midst of pain—becomes visible to the watching world.

1. Model Vulnerability from the Leadership Culture flows from the top. If pastors and elders present themselves as having it all together, never struggling with doubt, fear, or grief, the congregation will feel safe only to share their successes. Leaders must be the first to say, “I am struggling,” “I don’t have all the answers,” or “I need prayer.” When a leader shares a moment of weakness and then points to how God sustained them, it gives permission for others to do the same. This does not mean airing every dirty laundry detail, but it does mean being honest about the human experience of faith. It signals that the church is a place where we are real, not just religious.

2. Redefine “Strength” as Dependence, Not Independence In a world that prizes self-sufficiency, the church must counter-culturally teach that true spiritual strength is found in admitting weakness and relying on the body. We must teach that asking for help is not a sign of failure but an act of faith. When a member is going through a crisis, the response should not be, “Just pray more,” but “Let us pray with you.” We must create small groups and ministries where the primary activity is not just studying the Bible, but sharing life and bearing burdens. This shifts the dynamic from “I have to fix my problem” to “We are in this together.”

3. Create Safe Spaces for Lament The Psalms are filled with laments—honest cries to God in the midst of pain. Yet, many churches rarely allow space for lament. To create a culture of shared suffering, we must normalize the practice of lament. This means allowing people to express their grief, anger, and confusion without fear of being corrected or told to “just be happy.” We can incorporate laments into our worship, our small group discussions, and our pastoral care. When we lament together, we acknowledge the reality of the fallen world while affirming our trust in a faithful God. This shared honesty creates a deep bond and allows the joy of the saints to emerge not as a denial of pain, but as a triumph over it.

4. Practice the “One Another” Commands Intentionally James 5:16 commands us to “confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.” This is a radical call to transparency. We must move beyond surface-level greetings and into deep, meaningful conversations where we confess our struggles and pray for one another. This requires trust, which is built over time. Small groups should be structured to foster this kind of intimacy, with ground rules that ensure confidentiality and grace. When people experience the healing power of confessed sin and shared prayer, they begin to see that suffering is not a solitary journey but a communal one.

5. Celebrate the “Already” of God’s Presence in Suffering Finally, we must teach that God is present in the suffering, not just in the deliverance. The peculiar joy of the saints is not the absence of pain but the presence of Christ in the pain. We can celebrate testimonies of God’s faithfulness in the trial, not just after the trial. When a member shares how God sustained them through a difficult time, we celebrate that sustaining grace. This shifts the focus from “Why did this happen?” to “Who is with us in this?” It reminds the body that the joy of the Lord is our strength, even when the circumstances are bleak.

Practical Reflection

Creating a culture of shared suffering and joy is not a program; it is a lifestyle. It starts with the decision to be honest about our own struggles and to extend a hand to those who are hurting. It means listening more than speaking, praying more than preaching, and loving more than judging. When we do this, we create a sanctuary where the broken can find healing, the lonely can find community, and the weary can find rest. And in the midst of our shared burdens, the peculiar joy of the saints will shine brighter than ever, a beacon of hope in a dark world. It is a joy that says, “We are hurting, but we are not alone. We are suffering, but we are loved. We are in the valley, but we are walking with the Shepherd.”